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-   -   I see you (http://forums.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=54583)

SavannaPeterson 09-27-2014 04:58 AM

I see you
 
I see you trying over there

reaching out

using new words

rolling them over and over your tongue

I see you struggling to know

what it is

how it works

why you care

I see you looking up at me

bright eyes

you believe in me

makes me grow

scares the shit out of me

I see you

you're not just a face in the crowd

not to me

I know who you really are

deep inside

who you want to be

big and strong

it takes courage

to be who you were made to be

someday soon

too soon for me

bright eyes looking up at me

max crash 09-28-2014 10:08 AM

just wanted you to know I noticed, it's hard when they start to leave the nest.

very well put.


Max

SavannaPeterson 09-28-2014 11:08 AM

It really is just heart wrenching at times. Thanks Max.

Slick-Jimmy 09-30-2014 09:30 PM

That was nice. Quite nice, in fact. It's simple, but very subtle and touching. There is deep love and feeling in these words. I actually am very appreciative of this piece. Well done.

Keep at it, and...
Write Hard,
Jimmy Out.

SavannaPeterson 10-01-2014 11:46 PM

Thank you, Jimmy. That means a lot to me.

juicyfruit 12-01-2014 01:45 AM

Very relatable poem. I like how you chose to break up the lines, reading to me like the cycle of thoughts in my head when I have bright eyes looking up at me too. It's a sweet and touching poem.
:)

SavannaPeterson 12-01-2014 03:54 AM

Thank you juicyfruit. I tear up every time I read it again. They are little for such a short time.


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