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Search: Posts Made By: inzombniac
Forum: Poetry 02-23-2011, 05:29 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 909
Posted By inzombniac
So very ominous! I'm scared for the guy he's...

So very ominous! I'm scared for the guy he's going after. I like the timing and the details are placed exactly so that you feel the sense of anticipation. Nice work as usual!
Forum: Introductions 02-23-2011, 05:26 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 634
Posted By inzombniac
Hello & welcome!

Hello & welcome!
Forum: Writers' Cafe 02-23-2011, 05:22 AM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,878
Posted By inzombniac
All I know is I was driving my 14 year old...

All I know is I was driving my 14 year old brother and his friend to school one day when I heard him say something about "2 girls 1 cup." There was an entire moment of "Do I react? Then he knows...
Forum: Writers' Cafe 02-16-2011, 08:22 PM
Replies: 62
Views: 3,664
Posted By inzombniac
Unfortunately I can't view a lot of videos on...

Unfortunately I can't view a lot of videos on YouTube, especially if they're the "official" video because I live in Korea.

But here's a song:

Band Of Horses - No One's Gonna Love You...
Forum: Writers' Cafe 02-15-2011, 11:32 PM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,878
Posted By inzombniac
How do you have your jaw reset, by the way?

How do you have your jaw reset, by the way?
Forum: Writers' Cafe 02-15-2011, 11:31 PM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,878
Posted By inzombniac
Scratching the scalp reminds me of another one......

Scratching the scalp reminds me of another one... I absolutely hate it when my husband picks at the calluses on his hands and feet. Bleh, the sound is enough but the thought is just as bad.
Forum: Writers' Cafe 02-15-2011, 02:53 PM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,878
Posted By inzombniac
I'm not sure if I should be offended by your...

I'm not sure if I should be offended by your response, CandraH. I mean... being called a desperate, lonely freak is a little harsh.

Would this thread appease you any if I said it's giving me...
Forum: Writers' Cafe 02-13-2011, 05:30 PM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,878
Posted By inzombniac
Icon9 Cringe-Worthy

Don't know why... but watching someone else rub the palms of their hands on their blue jeans makes me cringe.

Chewing on the ribbed neck of a t-shirt.

Scraping teeth on silverware. :nono:
...
Forum: Non-Fiction 02-13-2011, 05:16 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 647
Posted By inzombniac
I am sorry to hear that. The space/distance is...

I am sorry to hear that. The space/distance is well played in the line breaks, then. I can appreciate that. Thank you again for sharing.
Forum: Prompts & Challenges 02-13-2011, 05:09 PM
Replies: 1
Views: 1,514
Posted By inzombniac
#39 - SBWM seeks SF

Mickey here! Just wanted to let all of you know that this fun-loving mouse is looking for a new play mate! Iím single now that Minnieís had her operation. Oh, boy! You know me from television but...
Forum: Introductions 02-13-2011, 04:37 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 1,025
Posted By inzombniac
LadyDomino, unless your work contains copious...

LadyDomino, unless your work contains copious amounts of valium, I can assure you - I won't fall asleep! :D

It is 23 degrees here in Pyeongtaek today. Electricity is ridiculously expensive so...
Forum: Non-Fiction 02-13-2011, 04:14 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 647
Posted By inzombniac
Hello, friend. I'm not sure what kind of...

Hello, friend. I'm not sure what kind of feedback you're in search of but as this is in non-fiction I assume it's very personal and I'm going to tread lightly.

Some of the line breaks confuse me...
Forum: Fiction 02-13-2011, 04:01 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 907
Posted By inzombniac
Rereading the opening, I can see how that might...

Rereading the opening, I can see how that might need to be reworded.




"Carson rested his chin in his right hand while his left idly peeled the advertisement taped to the counter."

Is this...
Forum: Fiction 02-13-2011, 03:46 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 1,031
Posted By inzombniac
This is well-written and while there are some...

This is well-written and while there are some words or phrases that may not be necessary to the plot, it definitely helps the reader to wrap their head around the dialect and/or location. I don't...
Forum: Fiction 02-13-2011, 03:22 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 907
Posted By inzombniac
Thank you, MickTheebs. I have a hard time with...

Thank you, MickTheebs. I have a hard time with dialogue, it always sounds contrived. Would you be so kind as to give me some examples that would fit? I appreciate your critique!
Forum: Fiction 02-13-2011, 03:16 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 921
Posted By inzombniac
Oh, I hate this mans luck! But I loved reading...

Oh, I hate this mans luck! But I loved reading it by your hand - you churned out each paragraph with beautiful conciseness. It works wonderfully as a short story and most definitely has that...
Forum: Fiction 02-13-2011, 02:44 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 907
Posted By inzombniac
Icon1 Carson - Short Story

We often portray our main character as the protagonist, even making their faults humble ones. Carson is the antithesis to the "perfect" main character. These short stories I write are exercises for...
Forum: Poetry 02-13-2011, 02:26 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 987
Posted By inzombniac
Sorry, been away. It is the fear of dissension's...

Sorry, been away. It is the fear of dissension's cost but do you feel like stating it's the cost of the dissension is reiterating the point the poem is conveying?

Redlorry, sorry - the edit was...
Forum: Poetry 02-03-2011, 08:21 AM
Replies: 11
Views: 987
Posted By inzombniac
Thank you, Nick, I appreciate it! I'll rework...

Thank you, Nick, I appreciate it! I'll rework it a little and see if I can get the message to be a little more clear.
Forum: Poetry 02-01-2011, 09:09 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 987
Posted By inzombniac
Thank you flavor and Nick. Nick, how do you...

Thank you flavor and Nick.

Nick, how do you feel it could move less awkwardly? Any suggestions?
Forum: Poetry 02-01-2011, 09:16 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 530
Posted By inzombniac
His misery by your words is endearing. I...

His misery by your words is endearing.

I especially like:

"...I soak my
sweat rag several times with water from the
stowed Mason jar to wet the mule’s eager,
sucking lips before tilting...
Forum: Poetry 02-01-2011, 09:06 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 487
Posted By inzombniac
It's not even his talent that astounds me but the...

It's not even his talent that astounds me but the sheer number of things he wrote and published. It's like he was dripping words constantly. Plus he was one funny man.

I Made A Mistake

I...
Forum: Board Games 02-01-2011, 08:24 AM
Replies: 10,582
Views: 221,011
Posted By inzombniac
9380

9380
Forum: Board Games 02-01-2011, 08:20 AM
Replies: 12,872
Views: 246,167
Posted By inzombniac
Curry

Curry
Forum: The Library 02-01-2011, 08:18 AM
Replies: 3,719
Views: 290,506
Posted By inzombniac
Currently reading: I Hope They Serve Beer In...

Currently reading:
I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by Tucker Max
and I've been working on Guns, Germs and Steel by Jared Diamond for months now - can't get in to it.
Showing results 1 to 25 of 50

 

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