Yeah I'm trying to start my own magazine-- So what? And no I'm not trying to scalp members; I'm looking for a special breed of writers. Or at least, a special form of a writer's work.
As always, this is PG-13. Who would have thought?
Let’s get payment out of the way. At this time we can only offer token payment of $5-$20 (depending on length and quality), but hopefully soon we can pay per word. What we can also offer is a complimentary free copy of the e-Zine as well as publicity for you the author. Your Social Media handles, Author’s Page, and Website will be featured under your story with a brief biography. We are brand new and hopefully the payment matter will change.
What we don’t want:
We don’t want some Charles Dickens quoting mother-fucker. Submit that shit somewhere else. There are plenty of opportunities out there. We don’t want someone who just learned to swear and wants to try out their new vulgar vocabulary; you have to know when to say fuck and when not to.
What we do want:
We want something good, but that’s a bit fucking ambiguous isn’t it? We want something you can’t find in traditional literary magazines. The future of language and literature is evolving and we need something that says that. Colloquial or just fucked up in general. Something you enjoy. Others may have refused it due to some arbitrary bullshit, but we aren’t hung-up on that. To put it simply, whatever you write that you enjoy, that gets you hard or wet.
Think voice in story telling; nothing is more powerful than first person POV, and an omniscient narrator is just as good. No list type second person unless the story is just too damn good. Talk to me as a reader.
Please keep Fiction and Non-Fiction under 5,000 words. If it is more you can submit it, but make sure it’s good and relevant. Always make sure it is relevant.
Please only 3 poems at a time. We may ask for more, but 3 should be enough to get a feeling for your craft.
For artwork please imagine Francis Bacon (the Artist not 'Sir') and Jack Kirby got together and gave each other handjobs. What would that look like? For cover, think Comic book not Magazine. Title "FUK'd Movement Presents" Subtitle "The Unpublishable" and make it issue 1. Look at a comic book cover for guidelines. Send no more than two.
For other artwork- please either make me laugh, want to vomit or make my asshole pucker. I would love cartoons, single panel, or any other art that makes me feel something. Send no more than four.
You can submit on our Website here
, or if you do not want to join email me personally at Fukdmovement@gmail.com
. Include “Submit” and the title of your work in the subject line. Only submit attachments if they are in Word Doc, or you can just copy and paste in the body of the email.
No. I have clearly stated what we want. And while we are on it, if we refuse we may ask you to send something else. If we don't- wait one week.
If you feel that your work can be published in another magazine, then we don't want it. Simple enough right?
Right now, since I will be online getting the website up and running, the response time should be rather quick. At the most under a week.
We request first rights, upon publication you cannot submit anywhere else for three months.
Now, if you are professionally published with a book deal and all that gravy- please Fuck Off! We want the authors crawling through the shit-soaked muck trying to get their creation out there. This does not limit promotions to only Independent Authors. There are plenty of Professionally Published Authors that are struggling, but it may take a bit to convince me.
If you are someone's Agent, Publicist or any other shit please just go back to Hell where you spawned. I only want to hear from the Author them-self. I'm not going to have my mother contact you so please act the same.
Of course, the novel/novella will have to meet our criteria before we accept it.
So, what is our criteria? Essentially I want something that will either make me laugh, vomit, or make my asshole pucker. Something visceral and raw. Your own fucking soul bled out on the page. Making me laugh is always a good-bet.
We can offer you a chance to include an excerpt and a link to the work. Feel free to ask for a review as well.
The questions we will ask:
So what's it about? Where'd you get the inspiration? What was it like writing?
Yeah- Fuck that!
We are going to ask you the real questions; what people really want to know. Drugs, what do you like? Toilet paper, one-ply or two? Whose tits are the best in Hollywood? All the real shit you know?
Deadline-- August 31, 2015
Editor in Chief