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A Sucker Born Every Minute

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Old 05-27-2007, 08:09 AM
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Default A Sucker Born Every Minute

(HONOLULU STAR-BULLETIN) -- Want to own piece of a Pacific Ocean paradise for just $39.95?

Too good to be true?

Not if you're willing to wait 10,000 years for the Loihi underwater volcano to rise above sea level.

A Hawaii company is selling oceanview lots that are literally just ocean for now.

Norm Nichols, co-developer of the online venture, says: "If you really think there's something here that you can't live with, nobody's forcing you to buy it. It's meant to be fun."

Real estate is understood to be a long-term investment. But 10,000 years?

Lo'ihi Development Co. will soon start offering oceanview lots speculators won't even be able to stand on for many millenniums. That's because they're currently submerged more than 3,000 feet below sea level -- on an underwater volcano named Loihi, located about 20 miles southeast of the Big Island.

His website, which has been up as a spoof for about a decade, will be renovated in the next couple of weeks to begin selling parcels for an introductory price of $39.95.

Buyers will receive a brochure and deed.

The website advertises "Lo'ihi Seaview Estates: Real Estate for the Future. Grand Water View Front Lots."

A photo of the sales office shows a raft in the middle of the ocean.

Nichols will probably get rich. The article reminds me of a Big Island friend who wanted to cash in on Hawaii's natural resources. His first idea was to sell "Hawaiian sunshine" in cans. The inside of the empty cans would be highly-polished bright yellow in color.

His next idea was to sell bottled "Hawaiian rainwater." Someone beat him to the punch and now that company sells a couple million dollars in bottled "rainwater" per year. I'm sure it comes straight from the tap.

As comedian W. C. Fields use to say, there's a sucker born every minute.

"The earth was made round so we can't see too far down the road and know what is coming." -- Isak Dinesen, Out of Africa
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