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Guidelines on writing nonsense.

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Old 08-27-2010, 05:42 AM
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Default Guidelines on writing nonsense.


Guidelines on writing nonsense.

Can you make sense of nonsense?
Is a little bit of sense required for something to be called nonsense? I believe there is some sense required. That is what separates good nonsense from gibberish or baloney. You can't just throw words together and call it 'good nonsense'.

Is there any such thing as 'good nonsense'? Of course there is. Makes sense to me that good nonsense is OK as long as in the end, it makes sense that it doesn't make sense. The real question is, does making sense that it doesn't make sense, make any sense?

If a reader reads your nonsense at least three times before giving you a dirty look, you know that you have written some 'good nonsense'. Keep them on the edge, like it is going to make sense any moment. Make them think they must have missed something that made it make sense. Then it never happens. No matter how many times they read it, it is nonsense.

1. First you write a statement that makes sense. (Tempt them)

2. Then all you have to do is expound on it without making any sense. (Hook them)

3. Long 'run-on' sentences are very good in nonsensical pieces.

4. Occasionally include something that could maybe make sense if you thought about it in a certain way, but not really.

Step four can be used if they ask you a question. You then point out that certain way of looking at it, be patient and step back while they read it another three times. That combined with the second and maybe third reading of the 'long run-on sentences', makes the 'stepping back' rather important.

Remember this while writing your nonsense. At least you’re writing nonsense on purpose and not by accident. Don't forget that anytime anyone says to you, "that's nonsense". You can always answer, "I was writing nonsense, I thought you knew that".

Common sense is nonsense to some people. That is a rather paramount problem in this world. It doesn't make sense that common sense is nonsense to some people because nonsense should be the exact opposite of common sense.

In conclusion.
Does it make sense to write nonsense? I know it doesn't make cents, but does it make sense? Since you can't make any cents writing nonsense, maybe it is just nonsense to write nonsense. It is nonsense to write about writing nonsense. That is a certainty.

I can usually sense right away when my nonsense, in that sense, will be good nonsense or not. In the sense that doesn't make any sense, it IS real nonsense to write nonsense.
By CaptJR

(was very tempted to put this in the 'Writing help & Issues' forum just for fun and let them move it. LOL)

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Old 08-27-2010, 03:02 PM
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Much madness is divinest sense
To a discerning eye.
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Old 09-01-2010, 10:19 AM
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LOL! You had me rolling on the floor. Such keen wit! I'm a big fan of nonsense for the sake of nonsense, and your rules are spot on. I think I may have even learned a new trick or two.

If a reader reads your nonsense at least three times before giving you a dirty look, you know that you have written some 'good nonsense'.
Priceless. You've made my day!
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Old 09-02-2010, 09:05 AM
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This nonsensical guidlines to writing nonsense is by no means nonsense. After all, the ducks do moo as the full moon rises upon this sense of nonsense...

Okay... I've already lost myself. Nice little tidbit, it did make me smile. .
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Old 09-03-2010, 07:25 PM
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I think I know what you mean. something like:

Hello, Now hear me out because I have a question for you. If a man were to walk around the globe, and say that it took no time at all, perhaps you'd be one of the few inclined to say "That is because time does not exists". Now that may be so, but a better reply would have been, "You couldn't, you'd have to walk on water.", which isn't that good of a reply at all since walking on water can be done and has been accomplished. The problem is not in the fact that, the man spun a globe and stopped it in full circle while taking a shuffled step to gather his balance and managed to persuade you to not understand the question.. But that he lied, No time at all, regardless of hyperbolated meaning is just plane misleading.
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Old 09-03-2010, 07:39 PM
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heh I like this.

You also can to do what Wolf Blitzer does and place a few more synonyms at the end of the sentence for good measure, punctuation, more than the required amount.
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Old 09-07-2010, 04:51 AM
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Originally Posted by ArcThomas View Post
I think I know what you mean. something like:

Hello, Now hear me out because I have a question for you. If a man were to walk around the globe, and say that it took no time at all, perhaps you'd be one of the few inclined to say "That is because time does not exists". Now that may be so, but a better reply would have been, "You couldn't, you'd have to walk on water.", which isn't that good of a reply at all since walking on water can be done and has been accomplished. The problem is not in the fact that, the man spun a globe and stopped it in full circle while taking a shuffled step to gather his balance and managed to persuade you to not understand the question.. But that he lied, No time at all, regardless of hyperbolated meaning is just plane misleading.
Hyperbolated?

The question here is, does getting the person to spend 10 minutes on google trying to find out what a word means, count in lieu of the three readings?

I might suggest in nonsensical writings not to use words that the ding bat reading it (me) might not know the meaning of. They might stop reading right there figuring out to soon that they are not going to make sense out of this.
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Old 09-07-2010, 07:54 AM
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Hyperbole (exaggerate the e)
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Old 09-08-2010, 02:32 AM
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Suggested reading:

John Lennon in his own write.
A Spaniard in the works.

And anything by Spike Milligan.

My Favourite;
Yesterday upon the stair
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
I wish to hell he'd go away
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Old 09-08-2010, 05:15 AM
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ahahhaha. that scitzo fool. Should go talk to him, walk away both of us thinking completely opposite things.
drugs will do that to you.
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Old 09-14-2010, 06:33 AM
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Originally Posted by ArcThomas View Post
ahahhaha. that scitzo fool. Should go talk to him, walk away both of us thinking completely opposite things.
drugs will do that to you.
Sort of wondering if this was meant to be in another thread or is it just very very good nonsense.
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Old 09-14-2010, 03:06 PM
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Lol, johnnies poem here is about his scitzophernia having a reocurring theme in the stairs. Like me before the mirrors.
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Old 09-14-2010, 08:10 PM
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I think if you put this in the help and issues forum, they would be fine with it there. There are some pretty good ideas on how to write something nonsensical and be effective.
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