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Warning! Wolf Sightings!

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  #1  
Old 03-13-2009, 02:41 AM
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Default Warning! Wolf Sightings!


*HoiLei marches, grim-faced, up to the Notice board. Unrolls scroll.*

People of Writer's Beat! Thank you for gathering to see this message; it's for your own health and public safety that I post it.

A wolf in red clothing has been spotted on the outskirts of our community. Just this morning he appeared, draped in red robes (though whether the red is dyed or blood-stained, none can tell) and smiling a menacing doggy smile. No-one knows his intentions, but we suspect them to be ill.

Some details
Genus: Canis
Species: lupus
Appearance: shaggy-haired and toothy
Dress: rich red robes, dyed or stained with unknown substance, possibly blood.
History of violence: Undetermined. Rumored to be a newbie-chomper.

If you see this creature, do not engage! Retreat immediately to a safe place, such as this thread, and report the matter to the administration.

*hears whispering.* (What? Why yes, they do look like Admin robes. Are you implying something? Well, shhh then! I'm trying to speak to our members!) Ahem.

Some people suspect that this wolf may be an "Admin"... some sort of totem or spirit needing recognition. I hold no truck with such superstitions, of course, but you may always consider placating it with offerings as a last resort. Hmmph.

*nails scroll to notice board* Be alert, Writer's Beat people! This wolf could appear at any time or place!

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Old 03-13-2009, 02:52 AM
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Aauughh! *runs around madly, clutching head* A wolf in blood-stained red clothing? Here?! No! Nononononono!

*seizes HoiLei's arm* How could this happen! I thought our security was tighter than that! What about our members? What about the newbies?

Oh, my. *paces nervously, wringing hands* Oh, no. No, no, no. . . .
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Old 03-13-2009, 03:08 AM
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Oh, they pass up the ranks too quickly for my comprehension!

You couldn't wait, could you?

I'll bet that Blue is a bridge from Green to Red. Besides for the obvious, it's not really that obvious.

Seriously, now; congrats, Winter.

Although, my... all these talented young staffers are getting my head into a spin!
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Old 03-13-2009, 03:14 AM
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* "I'm tracking the beast right now me' laddies... yes, it heads to the settlement... take shelter quick!"



"hurry SW... grab your battle axe and meet me at Moonbright's."

Last edited by Bagit; 03-13-2009 at 03:28 AM..
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Old 03-13-2009, 03:25 AM
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Laddies, you mean... whaddya mean by saying ladies...

Humph.

I've already got a little bug on him. I'm actually controlling him... but shhh, don't tell anyone.

---
Funny thought... not to be confused with Q's Wolfling.
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Old 03-13-2009, 03:28 AM
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Sorry, SW... i was typing it while you posted. and then i added the second line to make up for it, but you are correct... i did not mean to call you that, that is for sure.

Last edited by Bagit; 03-13-2009 at 03:31 AM..
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Old 03-13-2009, 04:01 AM
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Actually, I wonder what it would be like to be a ladle.
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Old 03-13-2009, 04:06 AM
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Hahahaha! Oh . . . hmm. A ladle, eh?

I mean, "Eek! Yikes! And a whole other bunch of exclamations! There's a wolf abound! Take cover."
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Old 03-13-2009, 04:07 AM
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I'll protect you!

*jumps in front*

Oh wait... are dogs supposed to not be frightened of wolves?
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Old 03-13-2009, 04:11 AM
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Yes. *jumps in front of the rat* I'll protect you! *sniffs at rat* Hmm. Or maybe I'll just eat you.

(*Side note: My dog has tried to take on a black bear, and a cat I used to own actually chased one away.)
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Old 03-13-2009, 05:51 AM
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Your dog too, eh Devon? My dog would've been eaten if we hadn't gotten ahold of him in time there.

I mean, uh...*growl* What be this? A holy ring of protection laid down about the town square? I shall have to seek toothsome morsels elsewhere, apparently.

I wish to refute the rumour that these fine admins have anything to do with me. Please do not burn them or stake them or any of that nonsense. I'll lead ye all on a merry chase if ye come arter me, though!

*slinks off into the night, sniggering*
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Old 03-13-2009, 05:56 AM
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It's okay everyone!! The moon was full two days ago, and won't be again for about another month. The wolf may be unable to eat anything until then. . .

*what? he's not a werewolf?*

Oh. . .

RUNNNNN!
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Old 03-13-2009, 05:59 AM
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It's Friday the Thirteenth...my lucky day

I notice you have sixty-six thanks, Firefly. I shall spare you. You also have 1, 333 posts. You are certainly spared
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Old 03-13-2009, 06:03 AM
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You look one away from 3K. Where shall that post be used at? Choose your thread carefully. . .
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Old 03-13-2009, 06:04 AM
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I think I used it helping somebody out with their villain. Fun little link I sent them:

So You've Decided to be Evil


Required reading for admins.
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Old 03-13-2009, 07:08 AM
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HAIL THE NEW ADMIN! Long live winterbite!!! Long live the admins!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! *bows down like an Aztec would bow down to a god of great power* Oh great lord of admins, the Great Red Robed One! I, the most unworthy of servers will bring offerings to thy!!! *give winter 30 cookie fresh from Tau's oven*
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Old 03-13-2009, 07:33 AM
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*give winter 30 cookie fresh from Tau's oven*
Halt! How dare thou stealest from Tau's sacred cookie baking oven! Knave! We shall smite you . . . unless you put the cookies back whence they had come.
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Old 03-13-2009, 07:39 AM
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But Tau cookies are the best, and the admins MUST have the best! They earned it! Oh wait I get it......... YOU wanted the cookies didn't you Dev?

Oh and Happy spring, for the robins hast returned to my state of Michigain!
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Old 03-13-2009, 08:13 AM
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Aww...it almost makes me want to reach out a foot or so and pat him on the back. But he'd probably bite me again. And I don't think he's brushed his teeth today.
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Old 03-13-2009, 08:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Night Wanderer View Post
. . . he'd probably bite me again. And I don't think he's brushed his teeth today.
"Again"? We have a victim already?! Don't worry, NW; you'll be safe here. Bagit and SW are tracking the wily beast. *readies pitchfork and stands in front of Night Wanderer*
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Old 03-13-2009, 09:38 AM
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Cool! You have a pitchfork?! I got some torches, maybe we can, like, start an angry mob and hunt the evil red robed wolve down like the crazy bunch of people, vampires and rats we are!
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Old 03-13-2009, 09:50 AM
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The ultimate high as all beautiful dies
A ruler's tool, priest's excuse, tyrant's delight...
I alone, the great white hunter
I'll march till the dawn brings me rest
Tenth patriot at the gallow's pole!

-Nightwish


I don't know why I just thought of that...but I did, so I posted it

Good luck with your pitchforks and torches, Matty! This wolf wields an axe of astonishing power! 5-way pickups and dual gain circuits, baby!

Oh dear, I'm hardly being the most mature one in this thread, am I? And I'm an admin now...the halcyon days are over...

...or maybe just begun! Ha ha...there's a new sheriff in town, and he's a sheep with suspiciously fitting fleece!
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Old 03-13-2009, 11:17 AM
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Originally Posted by HoiLei View Post
"Again"? We have a victim already?! Don't worry, NW; you'll be safe here. Bagit and SW are tracking the wily beast. *readies pitchfork and stands in front of Night Wanderer*
Yeah, he bit my finger. Fortunately, ever since I joined Writer's Beat I've remembered to carry around my trusty bag of wolf snacks, so that threw him off long enough for me to escape to this thread. *peeks out from behind HoiLei* D-don't let him bite me again, Hoi!
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Old 03-13-2009, 11:38 AM
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trusty bag of wolf snacks
Are they like Scooby Snacks? *wags tail happily*
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Old 03-13-2009, 11:40 AM
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Well...sorta. Except for all the sedatives.
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Old 03-13-2009, 11:41 AM
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Except for all the sedatives.
Ah! Makes him sleepy an' all that, eh?
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Old 03-13-2009, 11:42 AM
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Unless I got that mixed up with the PCP. Hmmm...*checks vials and mutters to self*
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Old 03-13-2009, 12:18 PM
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So, let me see if I have my facts straight. If I write an extremely humorous story about an everyday garden vegetable, say maybe a carrot or a radish, I could sometime in the future see my name glowing red?
(corn would be plagiarism)



Congrats Winterbite. May you govern with the wisdom of Solomon. The might of the Caesars. The humility of the now defunct Bush admin. (Gack!) And of course, the organizational skills of the Three Stooges. Or not.

Chill and let's work a bit more on those bar riffs. I think I hear a little cheatin' going on. Eh?

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Old 03-13-2009, 01:17 PM
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No! Honest! I...I...*breaks down* all right, all right! I used open chords once...but my fingers were so tired!

Write one of those stories, Gaines, and we'll consider it behind the scenes. There are many different objectives. But they're all secret. And you have to beat us in obscure 18th century trivia.

PCP, eh? Ridiculous, I...yaaah! Kill!

Veni, Vedi, Vici, all!
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Old 03-13-2009, 03:07 PM
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3000th post, eh Winter?

You horrid, horrid chil- beast!
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