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Call for Humor

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  #1  
Old 07-29-2015, 03:10 PM
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A new and unique literary endeavor is now available, for anyone with or without a funny bone. The University of Knumbscull ! Submission guidelines: Follow the Become A Member banner at the bottom of the page.

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  #2  
Old 07-30-2015, 11:36 AM
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Let the following information be a warning to anyone that thinks they are funny.

Humor is subjective as has been said. I filled out the submission form to your university and along with it I sent in copies of my best fart jokes and racist humor.

I also sent pics of my rubber chicken, fart cushion, plastic vomit and my giant three foot condom box. Nothing, not even a giggle in response. To say I am disappointed is an understatement. I thought I would be a shoo in, a real breath of fresh funny air.

So now what? I am relegated to a life at the Waffle House slinging hash for the late night drunks? Am I doomed to be a minimum wage slacker waiting until retirement age to collect my social security and supplement its shortcomings working part time as a Walmart door greeter?

I guess I shouldn't complain. I should be happy I at least made it through the ninth grade, on the second try.

My dreams of being funny are over with. I will leave funny to the pros, guys like Leno and O'Brien, Carrot Top and Fallon. Real knee slappers
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Old 07-30-2015, 07:34 PM
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I love that fucking Waffle House cook. Makes me my shit right there in front of my eyes at 4:30am. No, I am not just getting home from a long nights' party. I am on my way to work. Gimme three eggs, some bacon, and one of them waffles! All hail Waffle House!!
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Old 07-31-2015, 04:50 AM
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Carrot Top? He's about as funny as that guy who smashes watermelons.

Or is he the guy who smashes watermelons?
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Old 07-31-2015, 08:30 PM
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Originally Posted by JoeMatt View Post
Carrot Top? He's about as funny as that guy who smashes watermelons.

Or is he the guy who smashes watermelons?

Did you not see Chairman of the Board?
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Old 08-01-2015, 08:59 AM
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About ten minutes of it, I think.
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Old 08-01-2015, 10:38 AM
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I could submit something serious then wait, as most of my shit is only funny in retrospect...
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 10-08-2015, 02:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Gaines View Post
Let the following information be a warning to anyone that thinks they are funny.

Humor is subjective as has been said. I filled out the submission form to your university and along with it I sent in copies of my best fart jokes and racist humor.

I also sent pics of my rubber chicken, fart cushion, plastic vomit and my giant three foot condom box. Nothing, not even a giggle in response. To say I am disappointed is an understatement. I thought I would be a shoo in, a real breath of fresh funny air.

So now what? I am relegated to a life at the Waffle House slinging hash for the late night drunks? Am I doomed to be a minimum wage slacker waiting until retirement age to collect my social security and supplement its shortcomings working part time as a Walmart door greeter?

I guess I shouldn't complain. I should be happy I at least made it through the ninth grade, on the second try.

My dreams of being funny are over with. I will leave funny to the pros, guys like Leno and O'Brien, Carrot Top and Fallon. Real knee slappers
You're being dishonest here since it's not possible to "send along" pics and whatnot other than through email and none were ever received. Also, it's a humor site with a theme - make believe college courses, faculty profiles, students clubs, etc. Judging by the so called funny things you said you submitted you totally didn't understand the concept of the site. And then you post something here that puts the site down. Not cool. Others that aren't so mean-spirited, please check out the site. If you enjoy Parks and Rec type humor, or maybe even the old tongue in cheek Beverly Hillbillies, you might enjoy it.
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  #9  
Old 10-10-2015, 09:39 AM
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I think he was just trying to be funny, Editor Carp. Those without a sense of humor probably didn't get it.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 10-10-2015, 10:23 AM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post
I think he was just trying to be funny, Editor Carp. Those without a sense of humor probably didn't get it.
Yeah, lightin' up with the carping, wouldya?
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Old 11-22-2015, 06:56 AM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post
I think he was just trying to be funny, Editor Carp. Those without a sense of humor probably didn't get it.
He implied he actually used the site and received a bad response. That's not funny, that's disparaging. If the poster would have confined himself to humorous comments about the content of the site, or made coments along the lines of "i'll bet IF i submitted something..." that would be a different thing entirely. To me his comments were no different that if he'd said "I read Book XYZ and it stinks, the author is a hack" when in fact he didn't read the book. In the real world we call that a lie.
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  #12  
Old 11-22-2015, 09:32 AM
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I saw a cartoon the other day where a little stick figure watches the words 'the point' go sailing over its head.

I'm sorry you didn't get it, Editor Carp. Humor is where you find it.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 11-22-2015, 04:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post
Humor is where you find it.

Some of it has its teeth sunk through the back pocket of my Levi's.
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Old 11-22-2015, 06:56 PM
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...which would be funny to watch but not to experience. It's all about perspective.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 11-22-2015, 07:59 PM
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Originally Posted by Editor Carp View Post
A new and unique literary endeavor is now available, for anyone with or without a funny bone. The University of Knumbscull ! Submission guidelines: Follow the Become A Member banner at the bottom of the page.
It looks like a fun site and a good idea, Editor Carp. Is the Uni on Facebook, Twitter etc? You would certainly get the word out wider and quicker!
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