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Sell Me a Cool Car

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  #1  
Old 08-19-2014, 07:19 PM
egrizzly (Offline)
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Default Sell Me a Cool Car


...using flattery, sexuality, profound words, or superb stats sell me a cool car in 5 lines or less. You can make up the name of the car but it helps to use a recognizable luxury brand. I'll start below.

[in deep voice] A car with a personality worthy of a deity. With the power of 3000 horses it goes from zero to sixty in less time than you take a breath. Pure artistry and comfort combined in one. The all new Cadillac Z60..... luxury in true form.

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Old 08-19-2014, 07:50 PM
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Shhhhh. Just sit behind the wheel and listen to the purr. It's just you and I. Alone. Going zero to 60 in less than 3 seconds.
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Old 09-01-2014, 01:05 PM
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Originally Posted by JMummey View Post
Shhhhh. Just sit behind the wheel and listen to the purr. It's just you and I. Alone. Going zero to 60 in less than 3 seconds.
lol. JM you got to put the name of the car. even if its fake, lol.
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Old 04-14-2016, 06:55 AM
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( An impossibly sultry female voice ) "Pssssst. Hey big boy, I'm Candy, the automated A.I. concierge of your new Zydeco Zephyr. Slip inside me sweet meat and try my vibrating heated auto adjusting driver's seat. I want to snuggle you baby. That's it big boy, make that tiger tusche of yours comfortable. Now caress my go button right there between your legs and feel the throbbing purr of my twelve titanium cylinders supercharged with forward thrusting power. Ohhh Baby, you make my motor run....buy me big boy...buy me now.
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Old 04-17-2016, 07:26 AM
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Default It's Called; The Take Away

Okay folks, you've checked out this three year old immaculate red convertible Corvette and you've taken it for a spin. But let's get back to the real world. From the looks of your shoes and her handbag I doubt you can afford this baby. Why don't we take a look at a nice family four door sedan? It's a shame because I thought you two looked good in that Vette.

Editors note; I sold cars for quite sometime in the real world and made a ton doing it. This is one of many sales tactics that works. Usually the offended person or couple will get the sales manager and complain about the salesman being rude. Great! The manager knows the drill and ends up selling the car and usually within minutes. The salesman gets his commission. Managers get a cut of every unit sold off the lot. If the customer leaves offended odds are they really couldn't afford the car to begin with and there's no sense wasting anymore time with them. If you didn't buy this car then I know you are a broke dick! Drive carefully and buckle up!
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Last edited by Gaines; 04-17-2016 at 07:35 AM..
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Old 04-17-2016, 12:16 PM
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It's the Batmobile...
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Old 06-07-2016, 10:23 AM
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The Flyaway convertible turns itself into a moon rocket.
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Old 07-03-2016, 04:26 PM
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I travel lickety split; speed is my mantra
Im a racer's dream; a lady's crush
Masculine is my look, with an engine so powerful
Im heard far and wide when ignited, they call me Dodge Challenger!
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Old 07-27-2016, 06:22 AM
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You're spotty, 17 and think a 20 year old Vauxhall Corsa will get you a girlfriend? You're right! Totally...completely...right.
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