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Well, this is rare

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  #1  
Old 02-26-2017, 10:31 AM
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Default Well, this is rare


Usually I'm in here with a pistol

Not this time

And I wonder if I should hitch things together,
hobble out for a piece and return

Then my wife, who absolutely must
have something that is in here
(she is gettin' ready to go
out with her amigas)
opens the door

She gasps, her nose wrinkles (is that
water welling up in her eyes?),
grabs something and the door closes
tight

From the other side I hear
"DAMN!"


And I get a warm, relaxed
feeling knowing I
am not totally
defenseless while
writing this from a
compromised posture

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Old 02-26-2017, 04:37 PM
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I went to a rodeo once when I was a young fella and this bull just lost it and started running at the crowd and bashing its head against the ring perimeter, the clowns couldn't get its attention so they released a herd of cows. The cows wandered around the ring and the bull calmed down, fell into the herd and walked out.

This old guy standing next to me said something along the lines of, "When a guy gets out of line, the wife usually brings him back"
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Old 02-26-2017, 11:39 PM
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Yes, as a younger man I would habituate watering holes that had available females to keep me from bashing my head against the indifferent masses.

Now I simply stay out in the pasture.
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Old 02-27-2017, 08:31 PM
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Yep, check out one of those gaming stores where everyone plays Magic: The Gathering. The players can be found head-butting, biting, name-calling etc,but as soon as a woman enters the room the kerfuffle ceases.
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Old 02-28-2017, 03:32 AM
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Originally Posted by PickleBottom View Post
Yep, check out one of those gaming stores where everyone plays Magic: The Gathering. The players can be found head-butting, biting, name-calling etc,but as soon as a woman enters the room the kerfuffle ceases.
I never heard of such activity.
I really should get out and socialize more often.
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Old 03-02-2017, 12:15 AM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
I never heard of such activity.
I really should get out and socialize more often.
It is one of those, you need to know a guy who knows a guy sort of deal. Then the latter guy ushers you through a dark alley, and before knocking three times on a door turns to you and states, "if you need to go to the toilet in here, just go under the table - you never know who is in the bathrooms"...
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Old 03-02-2017, 03:32 AM
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Originally Posted by PickleBottom View Post
It is one of those, you need to know a guy who knows a guy sort of deal. Then the latter guy ushers you through a dark alley, and before knocking three times on a door turns to you and states, "if you need to go to the toilet in here, just go under the table - you never know who is in the bathrooms"...

I thought having been in the Amazon Jungle meant I had been somewhere,

Now I see I see I hardly made it into the untamed wild places.
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Old 03-03-2017, 12:32 AM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
I thought having been in the Amazon Jungle meant I had been somewhere,

Now I see I see I hardly made it into the untamed wild places.
Yep, I've put in a grant application for an anthropological investigation. I'm thinking a major expedition comprising of 8 jeeps, 52 people, 3 camels, 12 pack horses, 25 hunting dogs. I've calculated the acceptable collateral damage for such an expedition, and expect only one jeep and one camel with 8 people to survive.
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