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Mornings

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  #1  
Old 08-23-2017, 09:28 PM
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Default Mornings


The alarm goes off at 6:15 every morning. And every morning I hit snooze seven to nine times, eventually hauling myself to the kitchen by 7AM.

Then: wake and bake. Grapefruit juice. To-do list.

Today, itís 7:18 and I am rifling through drawers in search of a pen.

Where the fuck is the pen?

The drawers are mostly empty, save for a few which are chock full of assorted cables, cords and detritus.

I live in a world of empty drawers and no pens.

A red pen is finally located, rolling around at the bottom of a briefcase I haven't touched in weeks.

The pot may have inhibited the search.

By 8, the to-do list is complete and I am ready for a shower. Another glass of juice, a Xanax ó maybe one more bowl? Yeah, one more bowl ó and then we can get the day going.

Itís going to be a hell of a day, too. The world is waiting out there. An empire with 23 employees, five brick-and-mortar locations, nearly a dozen cars, two offices and $1.3M in revenue.

The rising sun (OK, letís be honest here: the risen sun) is just peaking above the neighboring buildings. It slices through the blinds cutting fingers into the smoke that dances in the air.

If I get out of here by 9, I can have cash in the bank by lunch.

A quick check of the email - 49 new messages in the last 7 hours. Wonderful. Sitting at the top of the inbox: "Sunday Night's Incident"

Fuck me. I think we'll be doubling up on the downers today.

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  #2  
Old 08-24-2017, 04:19 PM
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intriguing....
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Old 08-24-2017, 06:08 PM
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Welcome back IZA!

I like the short piece. You were always good at creating a moody direction.

23 employees, 5 brick and mortar locations... 1.3mil seems light for revenue. 1.3mil in profits would be very impressive, but then you'd probably have to be an investment banker for that.
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Old 08-24-2017, 08:40 PM
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If ya can't make a living off of 1.3, yer living too rich.

Good to see you back, IZA.

This piece seems almost poetic.
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Old 09-02-2017, 01:05 PM
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I really like this. Is it connected to the other story, Main Character? It feels like it could be, either backwards or forwards.

I just want so much more with both of them. I feel like with both you've set a great tone and established a good basis for a story, but you need more to really make it a story.

I know I'd read it.
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Old 09-02-2017, 02:07 PM
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Something unfunny was edited out by staff

Last edited by Mohican; 09-03-2017 at 12:09 PM..
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Old 09-02-2017, 02:22 PM
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Originally Posted by JesseK1213 View Post
I really like this. Is it connected to the other story, Main Character? It feels like it could be, either backwards or forwards.

I just want so much more with both of them. I feel like with both you've set a great tone and established a good basis for a story, but you need more to really make it a story.

I know I'd read it.
It is connected.

The "Main Character" piece happens before this, chronologically.

But the whole collection of shit jumps around a bunch. I don't really know what I am doing with it.
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Old 09-05-2017, 10:03 PM
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maybe add "Buy pens" to the to-do list. I did find it easy to read yet hard to stop.
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Old 09-06-2017, 06:16 PM
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I generally find reading about someone's morning very boring but this was not boring at all. I wanted it to keep going! You have a good voice in writing
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Old 09-08-2017, 08:08 PM
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Originally Posted by IZA View Post
It is connected.

The "Main Character" piece happens before this, chronologically.

But the whole collection of shit jumps around a bunch. I don't really know what I am doing with it.
You owe it to yourself - and to us readers, dammit - to figure it out. I really enjoy your writing and the scenes that you set, but if you can't already tell, I want more.
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