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Cerulean Suppositions In Amber Thought

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Old 11-17-2013, 07:58 PM
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Default Cerulean Suppositions In Amber Thought


Sylvan nymphs ascend the cathartic dawn
Where placid chimera kiss the sclerotic clown,
And parsimonious fools of meager renown
Bequeath papyrus memories, but no sound
Can reach ubiquitous nabobs going down
On swollen pricks, their pockets stuffed with loam
From farms and fields and lawns of neighboring homes
Where hyacinths bloom and children of circumstance play
In exothermic circles of roundelay.

And Umbrian stallions sleep standing up all day,
While multiple periaktoi turn to display
New logos, new hubris, new Stygian auto-da-fé
Controlled by Cassandran ancestors willing to play

Without conscience
All manner of nonsense,
With three before two....
O Clytemnestra!
Where are you?


Last edited by LanceRocks; 11-18-2013 at 03:54 AM..
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Old 11-18-2013, 12:56 AM
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You got me, I have no idea what's going on. Feel like I'm reading Shakespeare over here.
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  #3  
Old 11-18-2013, 01:14 AM
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Originally Posted by LanceRocks View Post
Sylvan nymphs ascend the cathartic dawn
Where placid chimera kiss the sclerotic clown,
And parsimonious fools of meager renown
Bequeath papyrus memories, but no sound
Can reach ubiquitous nabobs going down
On swollen pricks, their pockets stuffed with loam
From farms and fields and lawns of neighboring homes
Where hyacinths bloom and children of circumstance play
In exothermic circles of roundelay.

And Umbrian stallions sleep standing up all day,
While multiple periaktoi turn to display
New logos, new hubris, new Stygian auto-da-fé
Controlled by Cassandran ancestors willing to play

Without conscience
All manner of nonsense,
With three before two....
O Clytemnestra!
Where are you?
That's a wordy way of putting it.
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  #4  
Old 11-18-2013, 04:54 AM
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Ok, like <3Less, I have no idea what the theme is for this poem for sure. I do have an idea however. So i will just comment on structure if I may.

The first stanza flows well, except I would have removed "the" from the first line. To me it flows better that way. aside from that, the rhythm though rough at times, does work. It depends on what effect you want to have on the reader. The rough rhythm throughout this stanza gives a feeling of confusion, which could potentially work to your favor in terms of it sounding uncertain.

And Umbrian stallions sleep standing up all day,
While multiple periaktoi turn to display
New logos, new hubris, new Stygian auto-da-fé
Controlled by Cassandran ancestors willing to play


The third and fourth line works well, but the first and second less so. Perhaps it's the sounds of the words when placed together. Food for thought.

The ending two lines of the last stanza is quite powerful, especially as you have used an allusion there. However, because the last two lines are relatively strong, those before them doesn't seem to live up in quality, if you get my drift. Try keeping the power throughout.
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Old 11-18-2013, 07:34 AM
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Clytemnestra murdered her husband so I assume she is in Hades or someplace reading this and is perhaps just as confused as I am!

Lance, you've created the most verbose writing I've read.
And I think you enjoyed every bit of challenging our heads here.

Off I go for my 13th attempt at reading this poem...
Said never give up...but I'm starting to reconsider that idiom.
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Old 11-18-2013, 07:48 AM
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Originally Posted by NokturnalMe View Post

Off I go for my 13th attempt at reading this poem...
Please don't!

More than one Member has opined that I write prose and call it poetry. So I decided to make something with characteristics commonly associated with poetics:

1. Every line is capitalized.
2. Abundant end-rhymes.
3. Singsong, repetitious rhythm.
4. References to antiquity.
5. Complex, turgid style.

Please don't re-read as the text is utter gibberish with no meaning at all, and I apologize to everyone for posting it here.

Lance
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Old 11-18-2013, 08:55 AM
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Originally Posted by LanceRocks View Post
Please don't re-read as the text is utter gibberish with no meaning at all, and I apologize to everyone for posting it here.

Lance
An experiment then?
Reminds me of hearing somewhere about an modern art critic being asked to review children's paintings...
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Old 11-18-2013, 09:35 AM
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Originally Posted by LanceRocks View Post
Please don't!



Please don't re-read as the text is utter gibberish with no meaning at all, and I apologize to everyone for posting it here.

Lance
Lance, you spoiled my fun for the day. You could have strung that out forever, giving hints to the meanings buried in your masterpiece.

A few big words and a dash of mythology and people think they'd 'get it', if they just weren't so dumb.

Thanks for the laugh.
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Old 11-18-2013, 09:38 AM
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"1. Every line is capitalized.
2. Abundant end-rhymes.
3. Singsong, repetitious rhythm.
4. References to antiquity.
5. Complex, turgid style."


Oh, no. You don't get off so slyly. I'm reading over and over for just the reasons you list above. Plus, my vocabulary and history store are increasing, not a bad deal.

Franklin
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Old 11-18-2013, 09:51 AM
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Originally Posted by Franklin View Post
[I]

Oh, no. You don't get off so slyly. I'm reading over and over for just the reasons you list above. Plus, my vocabulary and history store are increasing, not a bad deal.

Franklin
You've got a point, Frank. I had to look up a couple of things to confirm what I was thinking and some of the others I hadn't seen since eighth grade, so yeah, it was like a little general refresher course.
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  #11  
Old 11-18-2013, 10:34 AM
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Originally Posted by JustcallmeEd View Post

Thanks for the laugh.
Thanks, Ed. Unlike my Intellectual thread on Southern relations - which I've milked for all it's worth - I care too much for those who post to Poetry to inconvenience anyone here further.

People understand that Picasso could paint in a figurative way but chose to go abstract to free his self-expression. Not that I'm Picasso (I'm not)...but I'm certainly capable of mixing-in elements some consider "poetic" simply because they are part of an older tradition.*

Each of us is a reservoir of items encountered down the years: a matter of letting them out. "Periaktoi," for example, is taken from my graduate studies in ancient Greek theater: wanted to use it somewhere!

: = )

Thanks again,

Lance

*Writing is, in many ways, a far more conservative art than painting and sculpture. I have posted a thread on this topic under The Intellectual Table on the Board.

Last edited by LanceRocks; 11-18-2013 at 11:58 AM..
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Old 11-18-2013, 10:41 AM
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Don't think this is about being dumb or being an intellectual in Greek mythology and all.
I think I am used to the modern minimalist poetry and it's good to know that a touch of classical jargon can take one back.

Reminds me of the poem Jabberwocky.
But at least you made sense Lance.
Sure a piece on its own
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Old 11-18-2013, 02:46 PM
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of course I like it, but being a fan all things turgid how could I not?
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Old 11-18-2013, 06:04 PM
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Lols, I guessed as much. Nice experiment. I love seeing all the attempts to understand the poem. I have to say though, that the allusions were well done.

I got fooled in the first read too, then i reread it and realized. There are no fools here. People automatically expect poetry to mean something, so how would they fore see that Lance was just mucking around?
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Old 11-18-2013, 06:20 PM
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Yeah, I read it and thought, this is not Lance - this is not what he does. It's a load of codswallop and sesquipedelian language.

But the sad part - Lance's bullshit sounds better than my attempts at poetry

Nice one anyway
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Old 06-29-2018, 11:59 PM
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Lovers of the poetry and quoted can get something new and unique with take tour of this site that is very interesting. If you are interested to buy essay online reviews then get them from qualified writers of world.

Last edited by xibabo; 06-30-2018 at 12:03 AM..
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Old 06-30-2018, 09:07 AM
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Hey dude LanceRocks, please use simpler words because man this made my eyes hurt reading those Jurassic words. Yikes! My only concern for the piece was those words.
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Old 07-29-2018, 07:04 AM
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I gave up trying to define poetry long ago. This is undoubtedly poetic. I also gave up knowing if a poem was reflective. By reflective, I mean something that was intended to please only the writer who nonetheless decided to share this reflection with us. In my mind, this is one of those reflective poems. To me, this is a window into a mind and was not intended to be consumed by external entities. If I am wrong, then, this needs to be made more easily digestible by those of us who go about on two legs and are not yet ascended into the heavens.
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