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Yesterday

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Old 04-15-2018, 05:51 PM
Elenita (Offline)
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Default Yesterday


Yesterday you were beautiful
Amber light shining on you
Like the sun waking up
A sleeping garden of roses
You wore a crown of petals
Dandelions picked before they
Turned to clusters of wishes
That you whispered to the wind

Yesterday you were beautiful
Fragrant with the scent of dawn
Like a pillow of perfume broke
And seeped into your skin
You loved that color of softener
Always added an extra cup
To cushion the lace and linens
That danced around your perfection

Yesterday you were beautiful
The stained strawberry of your lips
Like a vial of nectar pouring into mine
Sweeter than a crushed pomegranate
Your fingers in my palm like a bow
Ribbons and satin framing you
A princess on her throne of my heart
That I crowned with a kiss on your forehead

Yesterday you were beautiful
And I loved
The satisfaction of your design
So I pressed
A bundle of bills into the hand
Of the undertaker
Making him promise to keep you
Beautiful always

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Old 04-16-2018, 03:59 PM
Palindrome (Offline)
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Good imagery. I like the floral theme; it's consistent, gently melancholy and in harmony with the ending.
I'd lose the second stanza: the softener is a bit jarring, and the verse doesn't really add any substance.
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