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Ghost Brothers (515w)

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Old 03-17-2018, 09:48 AM
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Default Ghost Brothers (515w)


Dey ain't brothers, but needer of 'em ever knowed it. Clem nigh two years when his Pa brought Tad home, ne'ery three months old. And he ne'er tole 'em any dif'rent. Just let 'em go on thinkin dey kin.

And Clem always looked out after 'em and ne'er let any of 'em holler urchins mess with 'im. Reckon Clem was seventeen when he took Tad up in the hills a'huntin vermin.

Don't know how a lad like Clem gits himself lost, but I reckon he did. And Tad always left it to Clem to find da way. Needer of 'em knowed where they was, jist meanderin in circles most o' da night.

Den 'round sun-up, it started ta rain, n dey settles down 'neath a hemlock. N dat's when Tad saw 'em--mushrooms. Both 'em boys oughtta know not to go larpin up wild mushrooms, but I reckon dey was hawngry 'nough not to e'en think about it. Tad fetch 'imself one n gave one to Clem. Didn't taste nothin' queer n jist gulped 'em down.

Dey sat dere n watched it rain fer da better part of an hour n dat's when Clem noticed his lips n da end of his nose was numb, akin to drinkin a jug o' shine. Looked o'er a' his brother n saw he was teetery.

"Tad..." Clem says.

"Eh?"

"Reckon we dead now."

"How ya reckon dat, Clem? We's a talkin' a' each o'er. Ain't we?"

"We's ghosts, Tad. We done died long time ago."

"I ain't rememb'rin' dyin, Clem."

"Y'ain't rememb'rin' bein' born eeder."

"Naw, cain't say I do."

"Reckon we came up 'ere deering a monsoon n got ourselves caught in a flood."

"Ain't rememb'rin' dat, Clem."

"Y'aint rememb'rin' comin' up 'ere eeder."

"Naw, can't say I do, Clem."

"Ya remember an'thin a' all?" Clem asked.

"Nothin' stirs."

Den Clem shucked his shirt n pitched it down in da mud. Started wrigglin' outta his trousers.

"What ya doin, Clem?"

"Don't need 'em an'more."

"How's ya figurin?"

"Y'ain't col' are ya?"

"Can' say dat I am." N Tad started peelin' his shirt off.

Dey stood naked as jaybirds in a mud puddle, watchin' rain.

"Now what we do, Clem?"

"We fly." N Clem stagg'red like a drunkard t'ward the cliff.

Tad follered after 'im n when he seed the jagged rocks o' da cliff, he reckoned he knowed what Clem had in mind. "Wait, Clem!"

N Clem gawked back a' 'im. "What fer?"

"Ya always go first," says Tad. N hobbled t'ward da edge as fast as 'e could.

"Wait, Tad!" But Tad done lost 'is balanced. Tee'ered n sway, flailin' 'is arms 'round. Clem retched fer him, but jist as 'is fingers grazed Tad's shoul'ers he pitched forward 'n fell.

Didn' make a sound on the way down, but didn't fly none eeder.

N fin'ly Clem heard a Thud. Dropped t' his 'ands n knees. Crawled to the edge 'n peeked o'er.

"Tad... Don' reckon we can fly."

N he collapsed agin dat cliff n wept somethin awful. Brother or naught, he reckoned 'e loved 'im all the same.

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Old 03-17-2018, 10:12 AM
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Well written joke, ha! Did you know the way they talk, or did you just write like it sounded right? If you know what I mean? I guess if you think about the story, it does have a theme: love transcends blood, even among drugged dopes. ???
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Old 03-17-2018, 10:19 AM
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Is this Gullah dialect?
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Old 03-17-2018, 11:02 AM
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Originally Posted by daes13 View Post
Is this Gullah dialect?
My best effort at an old Appalachian dialect, where I spent some time in my youth. Not really from there.

I think there are similarities to Gullah and various creole dialects.

Also, why I wanted to keep it short; there's only so much of that a person can read, unless it grows on you after a while.
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Old 03-17-2018, 11:16 AM
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Audio if you want it longer. But yeah, reading too much of that can hurt the brain. I like dialects. Southern Appalachia or northern?
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Old 03-17-2018, 12:38 PM
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Originally Posted by daes13 View Post
Audio if you want it longer. But yeah, reading too much of that can hurt the brain. I like dialects. Southern Appalachia or northern?
Southern (West Virginia, Kentucky, Tennessee, thereabouts). For voice, I had in mind the poem "Old Christmas Morning" by Roy Helton without the rhyming verse of course. Just an old Jack telling a short tale.
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Old 03-17-2018, 12:43 PM
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So... they ate shrooms and mayhem ensued(albeit, slow, calm, southern mayhem)?

If so, I think you could make more of the shroom high. I mean, without openly saying it. You know?

I believed the dialect, but Iím not from over there at all. A native might find things to pick about.


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Old 03-17-2018, 12:44 PM
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There was a show on the Discovery Network for a while called "Mountain Monsters" and I think the humor of it escaped a lot of people. I saw Mountain Monsters as an exercise in the Appalachian folk art known as Jack Tales. Jack Tales are usually delivered orally as a performance piece. A common theme is "the one that got away". Hyperbole ending in failure. Having the 500 pound fish on the hook and winching your line around a tree to put it out. But, of course, it always gets away. That theme obviously doesn't apply to this piece but that's the style anyway.
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